The annoying thing about EFT is that it only works if you do it. Those of us who have been tapping for awhile can attest to this frustrating fact. The thing is, even though tapping is so powerful, a lot of the times when we need it most, we don't do it. We tell ourselves we're too busy to tap right now, or we pretend the intense pain or stress we're feeling is no big deal, or, my personal favorite: "It won't help."
Even though I've been doing EFT every single day for many years, and have experienced first-hand my share of EFT miracles, I still have that thought. And what I notice is that I only think that about my own stuff. No matter what issue a client comes to me with, no matter how violent or traumatic or horrific the experience was that they want to heal from, I feel confident that by the end of the session, that person will be permanently free from a good portion of it, if not all of it.
But when I have an issue, something from my past or my present day life that is upsetting me and stressing me out, that's when that niggling thought arises: "It probably won't work. Why bother?"
Why do I only have this thought about my own healing and not that of my clients? What is that? In a word, it's fear. Fear of going into the issue to heal it, when it's easier to avoid it (even though it's still causing you to suffer in the midst of your avoidance. Have you noticed?). Fear of releasing a chunk of our conditioning that we've come to think of as who we are. The ego gets very cagey at this prospect, and pulls all kinds of clever tricks to keep itself intact, unchanging, and forever in charge.
God bless the ego! It is so innocent and fearful, thinking that if it can just control everything, it will be able to create some security for itself. And that's okay. That's just what egos do.
A few years ago, a client said to me, "This is going to sound really weird, but doing EFT on my childhood makes me feel like I'm erasing myself. I realize that that sounds bad, but it's not. It's really, really good." I wholeheartedly agree with her. It is good! But let's face it, if there's one thing the ego doesn't want, it's to be erased!
When you find yourself in this predicament of being in pain, knowing that EFT will help (while simultaneously asserting to yourself that it won't), and afraid to enter into your pain with your tapping fingers, just begin there. One of the things I love most about EFT is the way it allows you to meet yourself exactly where you are.
So just start tapping the karate chop point and say to your sweet, hurting, frightened self: "Even though I don't want to tap on this issue (name whatever the issue is), I'm doing the best I can, and I deserve love." And, "Even though I know tapping on this issue won't help, so there's no reason to bother even trying, I'm doing the best I can, and I deserve love." And, "Even though I know there is no way that EFT will heal this issue--I've had it for too long, it's too big, it will never heal, and I will never change, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Just keep tapping on statements like these until you feel comfortable moving more deeply into the issue. You'll know when it's time to get more specific, to tap on the heart of the matter, because you'll want to do it—your resistance to tapping on it will be gone.
Until then, just work around the edges of your pain, tapping away whatever layers of doubt and resistance you may have. The tapping will release the inner barriers you have to healing your issue, and then, once those have been tapped away, the tapping will release the issue itself.
When doing EFT/tapping on your own, if you get stuck, aren't getting the results you want, or would simply like to have the support and guidance of an experienced professional, I recommend working with an EFT practitioner. To schedule a session with me, click here. If you feel that another EFT practitioner would be a better fit for you, click here to access a directory of practitioners.
For a downloadable and printable PDF of this article, click here.
BY HEATHER AMBLER
Heather Ambler is a San Francisco Bay Area based teacher and practitioner of EFT, writer, speaker, and founder of The 30-Day Tapping Challenge. Through her private practice and online programs, she has helped many thousands of people all over the world use EFT to find freedom from suffering and release the inner obstacles that were keeping them from living their best life. To learn more about Heather, click here.